Home Depot Reduces Theft by Converting All Physical Stores to Drive-thru

Home Depot Reduces Theft Drive Thru Chick Fil A

Editor’s Note: This was an April Fools Joke.

In an effort to reduce theft, The Home Depot plans to partner with Chick-Fil-A and convert 100% of all stores in the United States to drive-thru only sales by midnight April 1st, 2022.

“We’ve been dealing with a wide range of organized theft in our stores and have finally had enough. RFID technology doesn’t work and armed guards just make shoppers nervous. To combat the problem and win once and for all, we turned to drastic measures. As of midnight, April 1st, 2022, we decided to convert all of our physical stores to drive-through and simply sell everything online,” stated a representative for The Home Depot. “By switching to a drive-thru-only sales strategy we can reign in the terror of in-store theft once and for all.”

To handle the needs of real-time and last-minute orders, The Home Depot partnered with Chick-Fil-A to manage the conversion of all its existing stores to drive-thru only. Consumers will be able to order materials online using The Home Depot App and then pick up the materials from the store without leaving their vehicles.

“This is revolutionary,” said the THD spokesperson. “With our partners at Chick-Fil-A, we’ll actually cut down on retail theft while providing even better service for our customers…not to mention delicious chicken sandwiches. This is really a win-win scenario for everyone. We will, however, be closed on Sundays.”

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