Sincerely,
The Pro Tool Reviews Team
Be sure to check out these other great April Fools posts:
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DeWalt’s New Drill Heats Your Hands—For a Monthly Fee
Milwaukee, WI – DeWalt made waves at the National Hardware Show this year when it unveiled the DCD9999HW, a 20V MAX brushless hammer drill featuring the industry’s first integrated palm-contact hand warming system. This groundbreaking jobsite innovation lets contractors access an invaluable winter feature for the low introductory price of $14.99 per month, billed annually…
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We Added AI to 6 Robotic Mowers and They Immediately Lawyered Up
We’ve reviewed a lot of outdoor power equipment in this office. Gas-powered, battery-powered, even that one solar-powered automatic weeder that required a PhD to operate and only worked during the summer solstice. But nothing in our 14 years of testing prepared us for what happened when we decided to install experimental AI firmware on six…
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New Study Confirms Stud is Always Exactly Half an Inch from Where You’re Drilling
After 14 years and $4.2 million in federal funding, researchers say the findings are “robust, reproducible, and deeply humiliating.” CAMBRIDGE, MA — A landmark study published Monday in the Journal of Structural Domestic Sciences has confirmed what millions of homeowners have long suspected but dared not say aloud: No matter where you choose to drill,…
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Ryobi 18V ONE+ Battery Powered Keychain Garage Door Remote Review
Ryobi has spent decades building one of the most recognizable battery platforms in the world, and the logic has always been sound: one battery, hundreds of tools. Your drill, your circular saw, your leaf blower, your miter saw, and now—in what the brand is calling “the most ambitious expansion of the ONE+ ecosystem to date”—your…
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New Milwaukee Top-Off Charger Lets Your Battery Charge Your Battery
Milwaukee Tool has never been a company that shies away from innovation. From the first cordless drill to the battery platform that powers everything from circular saws to heated jackets to a dragster, Milwaukee has consistently pushed the boundaries of what a tool company can ask its customers to spend money on. Now, the venerable…
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VoltSense Pro Smart Training Gloves Shock You When You Touch Live Wires
The future of electrical safety is here… and it stings a little. After eighteen months of development, fourteen clinical trials, and one very memorable product demo at the Las Vegas Convention Center that cleared the room in under four seconds, a company called VoltSense has unleashed VoltSense Pro Smart Gloves™, “The most significant advancement in…
April Fools’ Day Disclaimer: The articles in this April Fools’ Day series are meant purely for satire and entertainment. Any tools, features, announcements, or quotes referenced should be taken in that spirit and not as real news or product information. Have fun with it—and maybe keep a little healthy skepticism handy on April 1.